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What a relief… I’m normal! Yay!

I remember aged 18 or so turning around to one of my olderbrothers who had some hang-up about something or another, and saying “I don’t have any hang-ups!”. Ah, the pride of the young and innocent! What he said at the time really stayed with me, he said “Hel, you’re not old enough to have developed them yet.”…  Well I am now!

Then I participated in a psychosynthesis “essentials” course… I was interested in what psychosynthesis was all about. The 5 days on this “essentials” course were a real eye opener.  Perhaps not in the way the course organisers intended…!!


The “Aha!” moment the course gave me was to realise that every single one of us has issues… Until I participated on that course I was not aware that I subconsciously thought some people were so together they didn’t have any issues… (unlike me!).

There were such a variety of people there, from heads of business to lost souls, some people were clearly on shaky ground (I think they were the bravest of us all) and others were the archetypal “stiff upper lip… I’m in control… I am a success… I really don’t need anyone” individuals, and yet… turns out every one of us had issues and when we dug down most of them seemed to stem back to our poor mothers. [Being a mother myself you can imagine the thoughts that go through my head as I am yelling at my kids!].

We all have hang-ups, we all have issues… no matter how old we are.  Our age and experience just determine how aware we are of them and how we deal with them.


Chiron - The Wounded Healer

Know the story of Chiron? Well, a synopsis is: Chiron is an immortal half horse, half man (among other things he represents our struggle to integrate our higher intellect and our base animal instincts).  Hercules comes to visit him after one of his conquests, bringing his weapons with him.  He hasn’t cleaned his arrows and they still have the deadly blood of the Hydra on them.  He accidentally cuts Chiron’s thigh.  Any mortal would have died. Chiron is immortal so he survives but his wound never heals. He spends the rest of his life looking for a cure and in the process becomes a master healer… through the suffering comes the gift.

In the firstpart of our lives we experience… some things we experience we barely notice, others make a big impact, possibly resulting in issues or hang-ups. [I like to call these my “personal luggage” as I carry it around with me constantly…]. These things are your unhealed wound.

You can overcome your issues and your hang-ups (start by just being aware of what they are…) and the things you learn along the way will become your greatest strengths, your gift to yourself and to the world.  Don’t ignore them, hide from them or pretend they aren’t there.  Look at them! Things are always so much more scary when they’re in our peripheral vision than when we put a light on and look at them directly. Oh, and I am not suggesting you do a Hercules and deal with your biggest challenges first, pick on your small issues first, build up your strength and self-confidence… And by the way, usually all you have to do is develop a clear awareness of your issues, awareness that you have a hang-up or issue and then watch how having that “issue” affects your behaviour… no big fight required, no big sobbing session, just be aware… slowly and in your own time you’ll let things go.

And yes, I still have some of my baggage and imagine that at 80+ I will still have bits of it. I look at my bits of luggage as old friends, supporting my journey to grow stronger and more into my true self… simply having accepted my “issues” I feel so much more at peace with myself. I trust myself to slowly look at what I do and why I do it, knowing that when I feel able I’ll face each issue as it comes up and work through it in my own time.

Peace comes too from knowing that I am meant to have my issues, they are my tool that help me to become the person I need to be to have the meaningful life I want…



Helen Evans is a non-predictive life purpose hand analyst and purposeful space designer.Her passion is to empower individuals to fulfil their dreams, entrepreneurial, spiritual and personal… to be paid for what they love to do, to live and work in spaces that make them feel good and to take care of themselves and their well-being.  She uses the pragmatism of her African upbringing and the deep intuition of her Celtic roots to guide her clients into the lives they really want.

If you’d like to know more about stepping out of your cave and into your light, please visit

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to invest in a life purpose hand analysis session.

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